Postpartum Depression and the Shame That Came With It - My Story and His Story

Postpartum Depression and the Shame That Came With It - My Story and His Story

From My PPD Story - I could feed him but I was barely able to take care of him. I felt awful. I felt unfit, like I was missing the “mom gene.” I thought I was failing in every way. Every day. I loved him dearly, but it didn’t feel right. I felt like I should love him better… Even worse, I couldn’t talk about it. What would everyone think? I have dealt with some stuff in my life, but I have never felt more alone. The sadness was unbearable.

From His PPD Story - In witnessing my wife going through PPD, I can think of few times in my life that I have felt more alone. More powerless. More hopeless… When my partner experiences postpartum depression, my reality crumbles. I feel the imbalance in our relationship. I feel incompetent (and sometimes just unwilling) to pick up the slack when she needs help. Postpartum depression renders our partnership impossible.

Brave Mother, Our Bodies Are Not Broken

Brave Mother, Our Bodies Are Not Broken

Birth is so many things.

Magical. Emotional. Incredible. Breathtaking. Joyful. Heartbreaking. Humbling. Overwhelming. Powerful. And always life-changing.

I have had the privilege of attending almost 300 births. Each one special and unique, every time leaving me in awe of how amazing women are.

As a VBAC mom, I am honored to walk this same path with so many women trying to achieve the same thing. Sometimes it is difficult for people to understand just how important this can be for us and how it is so much more than just how we give birth. For a VBAC, the preparation is different. More than just a birth plan or determining comfort measures, these women research providers, join support groups, take VBAC education classes, see chiropractors, do exercises to help with positions – you name it, they’ve done it. Without a doubt, they are a group of educated and prepared women.

“Healthy Mom, Healthy Baby. That’s All That Matters in the End”?

“Healthy Mom, Healthy Baby. That’s All That Matters in the End”?

I contemplated the title of this blogpost for weeks – The Failed Homebirth? The Plan? The Situation? A Doula’s Birth? WTF Just Happened? Sometimes no matter how hard you may try, things just don’t go as planned.

It has been so difficult to open up and talk about (or even grasp) what happened just nine weeks ago. I never know how to answer the question when people ask how the birth went. How much do I share? Should I tell the whole truth? Can I answer in a way that they won’t ask too many questions? Truthfully, I just want to answer in some way where I can avoid hearing, “Healthy mom, health baby, that’s all that matters in the end.”